I was watching a TED talk this week on what constitutes Success. Richard St. John asked 500 people with successful careers what they thought made them successful. He condensed their responses into a lively, humorous, 4-min. talk for the TED audience. I was struck by how many of his 8 keys to success were so applicable to the success of relationships.
Surprisingly many couples don’t really work very hard at making their relationships better. If they were growing a new business they’d likely be thinking, planning and working on it constantly. What if even half of the effort people put into a new business or project, were applied to improving their relationships? Assuming they knew what efforts to make, they’d be almost certain to see some real improvements!
FOCUS (#4 of St. John’s eight keys to success) is paying more attention to something you often take for granted. Really think about what you could do to improve things between you and your partner. Even just ONE thing.
Brainstorm (IDEAS, #7) about what might make it more satisfying. Get creative. Brainstorm together with your partner. Think outside the box.
PUSH YOURSELF (#5) it may be hard to change, but work at it anyway! Always wanted to run a marathon but knew you’d need to get in better shape? Taking the first step is crucial. Get up off the couch! Or how about a no TV night together? Or a date night?
GET GOOD AT IT (#3) Practice, practice, practice. We all know that practice yields results. What results can you achieve in your relationship?
One of the ways in which THE COUPLE CENTER works with couples, is to get them to take a more proactive stance in their relationships, to follow through with what they learn in our sessions and apply it during the week. We provide the ‘know-how’; you provide the application. You end up with a more successful relationship. What we notice is, the harder a couples tries to make their relationship better, the better it usually gets! If they get stuck, we can help them get unstuck and move toward results.
Ready to get unstuck in your relationship? Call us and see how we can help? 510 277-3111
Subscribe to our Newsletter to keep focused on your relationship; use it as a reminder that you can’t neglect it – it needs nurturence and attention!